HBM159: Final Haircuts

Scissors in front of a pile of grey and black hair.  Digital render by Jeff Emtman. Scissor model by sweedboy69 used under a Creative Commons Attribution license.  

 

Rocky Villanueva in his Berlin apartment. Photo by Jeff Emtman.

During a moment of personal turmoil, Rocky Villanueva gets an email from a long-time client.  His client is in his final weeks of life, and is getting his last wishes taken care of.  One of those wishes: to look like himself when he dies.  

Rocky says that many hairdressers and barbers have similar experiences: helping their clients through the last stages of life and letting them look the way they want to look for a final time.

Rocky packs his haircutting tools and bikes across Berlin to spend an hour with his client, giving him a haircut and receiving advice on love and grief. 

Support Here Be Monsters with a small monthly contribution: patreon.com/HBMpodcast/
Want to sponsor an episode? HBMpodcast.com/sponsor

Producer: Jeff Emtman
Music: The Black Spot, Serocell, Phantom Fauna


The Summer Diary of a Lady Artist is a fictional illustrated diary of an artist navigating love and hatred.

The Summer Diary of a Lady Artist is now available at all online book stores.

 

HBM155: Ghosts Aliens Burritos

A beam of green light illuminates a ghost made of aluminum foil. Digital render by Jeff Emtman.

 

Alex Greenfield says that there was no such thing as a normal day when he was a kid.  His dad (Allen H Greenfield) self describes as a “researcher in the shadow world.” And his mom soon grew tired of her husband’s lifestyle, which included a lot of time on the road: chasing rumors of cryptids, ghosts, and aliens.  

Content Note: pervasive language, brief mentions of bigotry.

After his parents split up, Alex, his dad, and an ever changing cast of motorcycle gang members and step-moms kept seeking the occult. 

Some of the topics discussed in this episode: St. Simons Island in Georgia (and reported hauntings), The Okefenokee Swamp (and the ignition of swamp gas), The Three Mile Island Nuclear Accident (and subsequent protests), Mono Lake in California (and the UFO sightings  there), and a movie called Being There (wherein the character played by Peter Sellers appears to walk on water). 

Alex Greenfield is the writer of The Sand, 10.0 Earthquake, and other movies.  He also used to be the head writer for WWE Smackdown. Alex’s dad, Allen H Greenfield (aka. T Allen Greenfield), is a UFOlogist and occultist.  He is the author of Secret Cipher of the UFOnauts, The Story Of The Hermetic Brotherhood Of Light, and other books. 

Unrelated to this episode, but do give a listen to the limited series that Jeff’s been mixing for Crooked Media.  It’s called Another Russia, and it’s about the assassination of Russian dissident Boris Nemtsov, as told by Ben Rhodes and Zhanna Nemtsova.  Available now on every podcast app.  

Also, Jeff’s headed back to Berlin, Germany for about a month.  If you know any good stories/interviews he should record while he’s there, send a DM on Twitter or Instagram, or use the contact form.

Here Be Monsters is an independent podcast supported by listeners and sponsors

Producer: Jeff Emtman

Music: The Black Spot, Circling Lights, August Friis

 
 

 

is / ought books is a publisher of spiral bound self help manuals, art books, and non literary works on paper.

All titles from is / ought books are available to buy online via the link below. is / ought books are also distributed via Small Press Distribution (SPD).

Thank you is / ought books for sponsoring Here Be Monsters.

New from is / ought books: James Finnegan’s novel: Das Ka-Ka-Pee-Pee-Tal and Other Works in Progress. Available for purchase here.

The Straight and Narrow

Interlocked gold rings floating in clouds. Image by Jeff Emtman. Digital render.

 

In 2012, a street preacher walking three small dogs tried to convince Jeff Emtman of his way of thinking about gender and the afterlife. 

In this Here Be Monsters brief, Jeff shares the short essay he originally wrote about the dinner party where they attempted to make an uneasy friendship. 

Jeff re-edited the essay in 2022 and gave pseudonyms to the main characters (“Cliff” and “Sophie”). 

Producer: Jeff Emtman
Music: The Black Spot

Here Be Monsters is an independent podcast supported by listeners and advertisements from small businesses. If you’d like to support the show, consider sponsoring an episode, or becoming a supporter on Patreon

Some other news: 


 

HBM151: Blowgun Time Warp

Image by Jeff Emtman. Digital render.

 

Season 10 of Here Be Monsters starts and host Jeff Emtman hallucinates his adolescence while working long hours. Scenes from middle school dances, dawn bus rides, the basement, and ( most crucially), a late-night raffle at a hardware store.

Do you like Here Be Monsters? Tell your friends, support HBM on Patreon, and have your boss sponsor an episode.

Producer: Jeff Emtman
Music: Serocell and The Black Spot

 

https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/radiolab

Sponsor: RadioLab

Are you curious about the world, but also want to be surprised, and even moved?

Radiolab experiments with sound and storytelling allowing science to fuse with culture, and information to sound like… well, music.  Join hosts Lulu Miller and Latif Nasser for an experiential investigation that explores themes and ideas through a patchwork of people, sounds, and stories.

Hello: a Radiolab episode that’s about humans and dolphins communicating.

HBM150: Cold Water

Image by Jeff Emtman

 

The origins of Julia Susara’s chronic fatigue are hard to pin down.  She still doesn’t know exactly how it started but suspects that a deeply broken heart had something to do with it.  

Content Note: Discussions of suicidal ideation.

Juila spent about three years going through some excruciating physical sensations: immense chills, brain fogs, pregnancy nightmares and the feeling that her blood was about to boil through her skin. 

Doctors weren’t able to figure out what was wrong, nor were the array of alternative healers she visited. Feeling that no one was able to help, she was at the edge of giving up. 

But, at her brother’s suggestion, she reluctantly visited a hypnotherapist who gave Julia instructions to swim daily in cold water.  So she started jumping in the ocean each day and felt a strange and near immediate change in her symptoms.  

If you’re feeling suicidal, here are some numbers you can call to speak with someone who will listen:

USA Suicide Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
UK Samaritans: 116 123
Canada Crisis Services: 1.833.456.4566
Japan Tell JP:  03-5774-0992
Australia Lifeline: 13 11 14
Denmark Livslinien: 70 201 201
Other countries: check the list available at suicide.org

Producer: Jeff Emtman
Music: Julia’s choir group and The Black Spot

This episode marks the end of Season 9.  Season 10 is coming, but the date is currently unknown.  Stay subscribed!  And keep an eye on the HBM Patreon page for an upcoming message with a season debrief and some musings about the show’s future.  That post will be public, so no need to be a member to read it.  Also, please note that due to some summer busy-ness, Jeff will not be able to run an HBM summer art exchange this year.  Thank you for all your support through Season 9.  It is such a pleasure to make this show. 

 
 
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Sponsor: Animasus

Emilius Martinez is an illustrator and designer who runs Animasus.  Animasus can help you design email campaigns, websites and improve the overall branding for your business.  

Speaking of which, Emilius designed the new HBM t-shirt, which is wonderful. Thank you Animasus for sponsoring Here Be Monsters!

Look!  It’s the new HBM shirt.  Designed by Emilius Martinez from Animasus.  Order yours today!

Look! It’s the new HBM shirt. Designed by Emilius Martinez from Animasus. Order yours today!

HBM145: The Juice Library

Amanda Petrus dressed as Brunhilde among a field of fruit punch.  Image by Jeff Emtman.

Amanda Petrus dressed as Brunhilde among a field of fruit punch. Image by Jeff Emtman.

 

Like so many others, Amanda Petrus got a bit lost after college. She had a chemistry degree and not a lot of direction.  But she was able to find work at a juice factory in the vineyards of western New York.  Her job was quality control, which meant overnight shifts at the factory, tasting endless cups of fruit punch and comparing them to the ever-evolving set of juice standards that they kept in the “juice library.” 

She calls herself and “odd creature”, especially for the time and place: she was a woman working in a factory dominated by men, she was openly lesbian (and yet still rebuffing advances from her coworkers), and she was a lover of Richard Wagner’s—sometimes dressing up as a Valkyrie.

Unfortunately, much of her time at the factory was characterized by the antics of her juice tasting colleague, Tim, who, in some ways, mirrored the traits of her favorite composer.  He was incredibly gifted at understanding the flavor profile of fruit punch, able to predict the exact ratios of passion fruit, high fructose corn syrup, and red 40 needed to please the factory’s  clients.  But he also shared Wagner’s xenophobia and misogyny, with his own brand of paranoia, too.  Often, Amanda was a target of his outbursts

This came to a head when Amanda was suddenly fired and escorted from the factory after Tim levelled an incredible accusation of conspiracy against her. 

After this incident, Amanda got into grad school, and started her path towards teaching.  She is now a professor of chemistry at the Community College of Rhode Island.  She also runs the website Mail From A Cat where you can order mail...from a cat. 

Producer: Jeff Emtman
Music: The Black Spot, Serocell, Ride of the Valkyries (performed by The United States Marine Band),Overture from The Flying Dutchman (performed by University of Chicago Symphony Orchestra), Prelude from Parsifal (recording from the European Archive). 

 
Image courtesy Amanda Petrus.

Image courtesy Amanda Petrus.

 
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